Naked men and new shoes...

So yesterday morning, about 5am, a gentleman stepped out of one of our elevators, stark naked. Thankfully, he was equipped with a newspaper, which he had apparently failed to wrap around himself, and was simply holding it in front of himself.

He was interested in a key to his room. He had been out in the hallway, fetching his morning paper, naked, when the door had suddenly, as doors do, closed behind him. I can picture him standing there for a moment... contemplating his options... thanking God that it was 5 am and not later... Then, turning, and walking stealthily toward the elevator.

The most outrageous part of the entire ordeal was the front desk agent asking the poor old dude for I.D. "He's naked!" I exclaimed... "He is not going to be able to provide you with a driver's liscence!" He gave her his address, which she thankfully accepted, and he turned, placed the newspaper behind him, and walked back to the elevator.

Several things:
A) Why did he not wrap it around him, instead of simply shifting it from fore to aft?
B) Wouldn't it have been awful to be travelling down an elevator, and have it open to that sight, first thing in the morning?
C) Or any other time for that matter.
D) What in the name of Fergis McDoodson was he doing getting his newspaper from a public hallway in his antique birthday suit?

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I move on. To today.
We got new uniforms. Mine looks like an old-timey barber's outfit. It is charcoal with gray piping on the vest and pants. I basically wear a white dress shirt and bow tie, with a vest and pants. I also wear shoes. Today I was wearing my new outfit proudly when Larry the GM and Ron the Hotel Manager walked up to inspect it. They were happy with everything, except my shoes. Now mind you, I have pretty nice shoes. They're leather sketchers. Trendy, with a strip of suede up the center. They're not dress shoes by any stretch of the imagination, but under a certain age (32) you can get away with trendy black shoes. Especially if your job includes running up and down 5 floors of stairs, 30+ times a day. Up till the uniform change, I guess they were acceptable, but no longer. Larry looked at my shoes and said "You need some more... formal looking shoes... like mine." I nodded and said ok... Of course, we're paying off debts, and thinking about diapers, so I didn't chip in anything about my urgent desire to follow up on his statement. I simply stated that mine were slip resistant and sporty enough to do my job well. He didn't ignore me, but he did overlook the statement. "Mine are non-slip, and very nice work shoes, but they look like dress shoes" he said. "Tell you what. Go out, buy some of these, and bring me the receipt. I'll buy you some shoes." I turned to Ron to ask him what kind and where, because of the vagueness of the statement, and seeing the question in my eyes, Ron responded that Rockports were very nice shoes, and they had them at Dillards. Now Dillards is one of the nicest department stores in town. Comparable with Marshall Fields of Chicago. I said "Yes sir. Thank you sir." and that was that.

Jeff, another one of the bellmen was part of this exchange, and as far as I'm concerned, a bigger offender in the skanky shoe department, so he was included in the offer as well.

I went home, and when Sarah was almost ready to go tutor, I picked Jeff up, we went to Dillards and bought some Rockports. And so, I obtained my first, really nice pair of dress shoes, and I did so on the generosity of what is turning out to be my best job yet. Other than seeing naked men, consoling crazies, and trying to find someone to drive any stickshifts I may need to bring up.

P.S. Neil Armstrong is staying in our hotel tonight. I truly hope I get to meet him tomorrow. He's in town for a retired Navy group who are celebrating some sort of anniversary.